Matt came back last night. He had been in the mid-west a week visiting his Dad. The separation was good I think. I missed him but I was okay which gave me some much needed hope in regard to moving south for Grad School (if I am accepted of course). I realized there is a difference between needing someone and NEEDING someone. I don�t need Matt to make me happy or strong, I can and should accomplish this on my own, but I want to have him in my life because life with him just seems better.

The application is coming along. I have decided to not write the letters of recommendation I need for the people who agreed to write them. Some of the people I chose gave me the �Write something up and I will be happy to sign it� line. I have been working at this job 3 years with crappy pay and no hope of a raise, you will be happy to write me something! At least this is what I would have said if I didn�t need the letters so badly and thus do not have the option of pissing anyone off. All the same I am not writing the letters, instead I have written them outlines and given them suggestions on what to write: I thought this was a good compromise.