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September 23, 2003

5:02 p.m.: Bad Blood

I have a fear bordering on a phobia of veins, blood and needles. Giving blood is an arduous task and I always have to give a long dissertation to the nurse taking my blood that boils down to, �I do not want to hear, feel or see anything. I do not need to know how good or bad my veins are etc.�. With this said, I went to the doctor today to find out exactly what is wrong with my stomach. For the doctor to rule out certain diseases and such he needed to take some blood. The nurse came in and preceded to locate a vein, I immediately launched into my spiel. Unfortunately she was either deaf or dumb or both because she continued to say things like �I cant seem to find a good one� while poking me. At this point I am sweating and feeling sick. After examining and rubbing both crooks of my arms she finally tries to draw the blood only to tell me that she �totally missed� and would like to draw from my wrist. After I was done laughing in her face she went to get the doctor. He came and the whole dreadful procedure began again, only this time I had both of them commenting and poking.

After about 15 minutes he was able to locate a vein and draw the blood. He then held up the syringe with my blood in it and said, �Now that wasn�t so bad was it?� Well it would have been okay if you just hadn�t shoved my worst fear right in my face, but thank you for asking.

To top off my visit I was supposed to give a urine sample so the doctor could prescribe me some antibiotics for my 10th bladder infection this year. Unfortunately I had peed right before I had left work, that combined with the recent horror of the bloody syringe kept the pee at bay. I sat in the bathroom for so long trying to will my bladder to release its contents that the nurse finally knocked on the door and to see if I was okay. Checking the clock on my cell phone I realized I had been in there for over 30 minutes. Embarrassed I put the empty sterile cup in the little cubby and left the office in a considerable hurry. Luckily I have a follow-up appointment next week so I can relive everything all over again.